The wind
I wandered around the joint, pretending to be interested. In fact I may have been, but like the other dozen or so tire-kickers, it depended on the price. Though I was later informed by my prettier half, "no one was there to buy, they were only nosing around - just like you." Ok. I was busted on that one because the place was empty - about as surprising as Lady Gaga wearing a hat made from goat turds - and being empty meant there was plenty of access to taps, showers, toilets, cupboards, wardrobes. You could turn, pull, push and open everything to liked and if that didn't get the hormones racing, there was always the auction in five minutes time. Apparently that was what gave me, and the other rubberneckers, away. We weren't here to look at the house, just to see what the house went for - if it went at all. And if everyone at an auction is only there to watch other people bidding... yeah, you know what happens next. The auctioneer cracked his whip and rounded us into ...