Dumbest. Seller. Ever.

I've been watching this property (with amazement) since the inception of this blog, but have never featured it before. The primary reason is that it's not polite to make fun of the mentally retarded.

You see, this apartment has spent 622 days on the market with absolutely no interest--yet during that time the price has only been reduced twice. And despite racking up more than 20 months on the MLS, those price reductions have totalled less than 4%. Yep, that sales strategy can only be explained by a seller with severe mental deficiencies.

Address: 1401 E 3rd St #15, 90802
Asking Price: $490,000
Size: 2 beds, 2 baths, 1220 sq. ft. (built in 1964)
$/Sq. Ft.: $402
HOA Fee: $262 (That seems awfully high considering the lack of amenities)
Purchase price: N/A
Purchase date: N/A
MLS#: K706733
On Redfin: 622 days
Down Payment: $98,000
Monthly Payment: $3,200
Income Requirement (3.5X income = realistic mortgage amount): $112,000
Description: THE DIPLOMAT, 2BEDROOM, 2BATH TOP FLOOR PREMIUM UNIT IN THE BUILDING WITH LARGE PRIVATE BALCONY. LONG BEACH AND PALOS VERDE VIEW. .HIGHLY UPGRATED WITH GRANITE COUNTERTOPS, STAINLESS APPLIANCES, CROWN MOLDING , CARRARA MARBLE TILED BATH, INSIDE WASHER AND DRYER, INTERCOM ACCESS, PARKING SPACE INSIDE GATED SUBTERRANEAN GARAGE. CLOSE TO BEACH , SMALL BUILDING, ONLY 16 UNITS, JUST A FEW 2 BEDROOMS

The listing agent, in addition to committing realtor malpractice for failing to convince their reality-impaired client to meaningfully cut their certifiably-WTF price, has had 622 days to write a comprehensible listing description and provide pictures of the "UPGRATED" interior.

Epic FAIL on both counts.

And after reading that poor excuse for a description, it appears as if the realtor is also mentally challenged (or at the very least illiterate).

Helluva team!



Asking $402 per square foot in this neighborhood, this close to the sketchy parts of downtown, with this few amenities, can only be explained by mental disability. Or a severe allergy to current events. Either way, just what the f**k are they thinking after 622 days on the market? "Any day now"??

To put into perspective just how ridiculous this asking price is, let's play a game of Would You Rather!

If you clocked more than $100,000 per year and wanted a sweet pad, would you buy this overpriced apartment with no interior photos, or would you rather save $40,000 and buy this nearby 1,100 square foot loft:



At least they bothered to provide photo evidence of the "UPGRATES." Plus, after 271 days on market they might be willing to deal on this modern, sleek loft.

Or, would you rather buy this nearby condo with upgraded bathrooms and floors (our mental midget at 1401 only has carpet) for $319,000:





If you bought this tidy little place, with a price unchanged since April and 393 total DOM, you'd have enough left over to buy a car commensurate with your six-figure income ($112,000 is four times the local median income, you big baller!) like a Beluga black Bentley Continental GT with a turbocharged 6.0L W12 under the hood:



Helpful hint: Definitely keep it garaged in this neighborhood.

Anyhow, by refusing to accept reality, all of these idiots (but especially the dolt asking $490,000) do nothing but clog up the MLS and prevent responsible, informed buyers from being able to enter the market and have their shot at The American Dream(tm).

Three adjacent properties; a combined 1286 days on market.

I can think of several words to describe that little statistic, but none better than


Greedtarded.